by Thomas Hobson
Child Life Director

Most families will tell you that when their child is in the hospital, they would bend over backwards if that’s what it took to help the experience.  There is one thing that parents can do that will make a major difference in their child’s hospitalization.  It’s amazingly simple: be present during the hospitalization.

I realize that the last statement doesn’t seem like a major announcement, and in fact, it seems obvious.  However, I want to take the chance to underscore the in importance of having parental presence in the hospital.

First let me start by saying that from a historical standpoint, hospitals have not always allowed parents to stay with their child, but instead had visiting hours.  I am proud to say that that viewpoint is one that is almost gone. As a matter of fact, at Le Bonheur Children’s, we feel so strongly about it that in the new building there is space in every room for parents to sleep in the room.  That statement includes every critical care bed (i.e. intensive care unit, neonatal intensive care unit).

In fact, children’s hospitals will be the first to tell you that having parents there makes all of the difference in the child’s hospitalization.  This makes sense when you consider the fact that most children have spent little, if any, time in a hospital.  The environment is unlike any the child has been in, and can quickly become scary and overwhelming.  The child is cut off from their normal support systems, which would normally help them to cope with the situation.

The truth is that parents bring stability to the child’s life, and it shows the child that they are here as a support.  I tend to think of the parents (and the rest of the family) as something that helps to ground the child to their normal life outside of the hospital.  As patient and family centered as we are at Le Bonheur, we are no substitute for family.  That is not to say that we don’t care, but the child has lots more history with the parents than they do with us.

I should also mention that it is important for the family to be there physically and mentally, which can be a challenge.  Trust me, I have multitasked before, playing with my children and checking my phone, and my five-year-old son looks at me and says, “I thought you were playing with us, put away your phone.”  No truer words have been spoken, because the truth was I wasn’t there for them.

Now, life continues to happen, and families still need to carry on with their lives.  My advice for parents would be this: Try as best you can to be present during your child’s hospitalization.  Even if you have to take shifts, it’s better than not being present.  Oh yea, and put away your phone and be there.  I promise your child will thank you for it.